My Chains Are Gone - I've Been Set Free!

I had the most amazing image cross my mind this morning and I couldn't help but share it with some of you. I'll try my best to paint this picture, but I know my words will fail to portray exactly what I'm thinking or what I saw.

I'm just standing there, not anywhere in particular, just standing by myself. I'm completely covered in blood and there are pieces of me missing - these huge gaping holes all throughout my body - almost like puzzle pieces missing from the whole picture. But then I see Jesus standing behind me - this bright shining silhouette - and I start to see that light not only shining through those missing pieces, but all around me.

I know that sounds kind of crazy/gruesome/weird/etc...but let me explain. I'm broken and wounded, but it's not my blood that justifies those wounds, I'm covered in HIS blood. He fills those broken and barren places in my life, making me whole again, and then uses them to shine through me and show His glory and power, but it's not just in those missing pieces that He is shining through - I am completely enveloped in His glory and light...so much so that the edges of my body are blurred to the point that I can no longer be identified as a separate individual, but more so a part of Him...if that makes sense! It's actually a really simple picture when you think about it, but I needed to be reminded that my purpose here on this earth is simply to glorify God...no matter what my past has held, how hurt i've been, or how wounded I might be. These pieces and things that have been missing or broken in my life are now being restored through Him. He has broken these chains and is making me new...and I absolutely LOVE it! It's hard and it hurts like crazy at times, but I know my God is there and is molding and shaping me into the person He has always intended for me to be.

Ephesians 3:17-19
"Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God." NLT

Hebrews 10:19-23
"And so, dear brothers and sisters, we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus. By his death, Jesus opened a new and life-giving way through the curtain into the Most Holy Place. And since we have a great High Priest who rules over God’s house, let us go right into the presence of God with sincere hearts fully trusting him. For our guilty consciences have been sprinkled with Christ’s blood to make us clean, and our bodies have been washed with pure water. Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." NLT

Relationships...

I wanted to re-post a blog I wrote about 5 years ago. I was 17 years old and a brand new freshman in college at the time I first penned these words on paper. I remember feeling so passionate about this topic, yet so frustrated that very few girls my age had even considered it. Fast forward 5 years, and it is still a topic I hold very close to my heart. I feel it is something so many young girls desperately need to hear in the culture we live in today. We could save ourselves from so much hurt and pain if only we'd learn to trust! 

RELATIONSHIPS & MY FUTURE HUSBAND (originally posted on December 7, 2006)

So, the issue of relationships has been brought to my attention yet once again...so, I decided to just write out what I think, so I don't have to keep repeating myself. Ha!

One of my biggest fears is that I will wake up next to my future husband one day and regret even more things in my past than I already do. Through situations of my own, looking at others mistakes, and through countless hours of prayer, I have been able to establish what I think about dating...so, here it is...in one big nutshell! 

Someone once told me concerning dating a particular girl: "...dating doesn't mean i'm giving her something that i will never be able to give to another person later. I try to give her love, attention, compassion, understanding, someone to depend on, a friend, a hand, a kind word, a gesture, and most of all I try to proceed in a manner benefiting my religion and my beliefs. All those things are something that i can give to someone else, all of those things are infinite, they have no end." - Yes, he is right...all of those things do not have an end, and can be given to more than one person, but to what degree? All of those things he is "giving" this girl are what causes him to "like..her...even more so everyday." Those very things are what causes you to become attatched to someone (whether emotionally or physically). Concerning a previous b/f I had in the past...the things I gave him: time I can never get back, or time I can never give to my husband...it is no longer mine, but his (the previous b/f). All my memories, my first kiss, my first "love", my first time holding hands..or my second, or my third, the looks, the words we spoke to each other "declaring" our feelings...all of these are no longer things I can have or take back, but are his to keep. They are things my husband will never be able to have from me. Now, I can hold hands with my husband, kiss him, make memories with him, share my "love" and feelings with him, and give him my words, but not for the first time...and it will be something I've already given to my ex boyfriend(s) before him...tainting my gift for my husband...giving him things I've already given my boyfriend(s) of the past. 

Having a relationship is not a bad thing, however, and is not what I am trying to convey in here. No, it's not a bad thing...but why get so involved at such a young age to where you never grasp who you truly are apart from a guy? Who you are, most importantly, with Christ. Can you truly make Christ your True Prince when there is always another guy before you truly understand and obtain an intimate relationship with Him? And purity...it's so much more than just your virginity and sexual experiences! If that were the case, I'd be pretty screwed...to be blunt. We were not born pure...we are sinners. We may have lost our innocence in the past, but we couldn't have lost our purtiy if we have never had it to start with. So, my questions is, how much of your innocence will you be able to give to you future spouse when you do meet him? Will you already know all the ends and outs of a relationship before you truly have one with the man God has intended for you? Will you honestly be able to say that you will not struggle with not being able to give him your best? Will it not matter to you that instead of preparing yourself to be with him, and become the wife God intended you to be for him, you rather spent your time investing yourself in every other guy that showed an "interest" in you? Do you want your husband to have that attitude about you now? Or do you want him to cherish you, even now...?!? I know I do!!! I hope he is praying for me, as I am for him...I hope he thinks about me as much as I think about him...I hope he doesn't give away the pieces of his heart that belong to me to some "good girl" he might meet at church, school, summer camp, where ever... Who doesn't feel this way?! 

Now, I have never condemned anyone for dating. Dating is not a bad thing, when practiced in the right time and setting...but can you not have enough faith in Christ that He will show you who to have a serious relationship with? Or, do you think He will guide you in the wrong direction -- towards pain and heartache? Go on dates, have fun...but what ever happened to just keeping it as friends? Are you ready to marry that person you are in a serious relationship with?! If not, then what's the point of a serious relationship? Where is it doing anything beneficial to you or your faith? But only robbing your future spouse of things you have suppossedly promised him. Yes, you can and should learn form your mistakes, but why make mistakes - simply to learn?! When you take a step back and really think about that last statement - it seems pretty ridiculous that we feel as if we have to make mistakes to help us learn/mature/grow up - yet, suprisingly, a very large portion of young adults/teens do believe that! Learn from others mistakes and God's Word. The heart is deceitful above all things...(Jeremiah 17:9) we cannot trust our emotions and feelings. We must reley on God's Word and the truth He has given us...What is the Lord telling you to do?! Not your heart...or your feelings. We all want that someone to hold and comfort us...God created us this way, and it is only natural to desire this...but only in God's perfect timing. Hollywood, today's music, and television have all tainted our perspective on our intimate relationships with others...telling us it is ok, that our husband will maybe have given things away too, so he'll understand what your feeling, and it will be ok that you can't give your wholeself to him --physically, emotionally, and spiritually before Christ. It's certainly nice to think about, but I think we've forgotten that 2 "half" persons do not necessarily make one "whole". Now, just picture yourself explaining to your future husband about all your previous boyfriends or girlfriends and everything you gave to them instead of saving it for him. 

So, my question is...is it worth it? Why not simply trust Christ to show you who you belong with, and save yourself completley for him...?! Easier said than done, especially in the society we live in today...

Hi!

Well, I decided to jump on the bandwagon and create my very own blog! Actually, I used to have a xanga, but I never really wrote much of anything in it - other than your typical teenage angst, of course! =) I like to think, however, that I have more important things to say now...I guess we will find out! =) I'm definitely not the most gifted of writers out there, but hopefully you will find something I have to say either thought-provoking, inspiring, and/or interesting from time to time. 

Also, If you know me at all, then you know I have a passion for photography. I don't fancy myself a "photographer" by trade, but I like taking pictures, and that is, after all, what matters most! So, I'll also be uploading some photographs quite frequently.

So, here's to the start of my blogging career! =)